The Joys of Motherhood|Buchi Emecheta
Photo: Shayera Dark
The Joys of Motherhood, Buchi Emecheta’s fourth novel, is on a par with African classics like Flora Nwapa’s Efuru in its depiction of Igbo culture and social norms in relation to women. Written in 1979 and set in pre-independence Nigeria, the book remains soberly relevant in its outlook on patriarchy, resistance to women’s shifting roles, colonialism’s impact on African culture, and the notion of pregnancy as the ultimate prize and pride of womanhood continue to be debated, and how these factors play out in religion, public policies and private spaces.
The story unfolds in the south-eastern town of Ibuza and Lagos, which are metaphors for tradition and modernity respectively, and follows the young protagonist Nnu Ego through marriage, motherhood and changing cultural norms.
Following the demise of Nnu Ego’s first marriage due to her inability to get pregnant, her father quietly marries her off to Nnaife, a fellow townsman working in Lagos, a city far away from the prying eyes of Ibuza. There, everything she knows is upended: In Ibuza, no self-respecting woman would sleep with a soldier, but under the harsh realities of Lagos respectability takes a back seat. And unlike in Ibuza, where women in Ibuza are expected to trade after birth, with no grandparents to babysit, Nnu Ego discovers working and childrearing almost impossible to balance in the city. Her perspective on life changes as well, and the term ‘senior wife’ becomes an irritating reminder of Nnaife’s polygamous existence rather than a source of pride.
Nnaife’s job as a laundryman to his white master inspires little pride in Nnu Ego, especially when she sees him blithely inspecting the laundered undergarments of Madam. So when he informs Nnu Ego that they have to marry in church since she’s pregnant or risk offending Madam, she explodes at the thought of a wealthy chief’s daughter caving in to the white woman's demands.
“You behave like a slave,” Nnu Ego snaps at her husband, adding that she won’t marry in church. “I want to live with a man, not a woman-made man.”
Later, when she informs her neighbour of her husband’s behaviour, the woman affirms both their husbands are indeed slaves as their salaries can barely afford them decent accommodation. It’s a reality Nnu Ego finds jarring, considering her father freed his slaves because white men deemed slavery illegal.
Nnu Ego experiences her first pain of motherhood when her baby suddenly dies. But after an unsuccessful suicide attempt, more kids follow in rapid succession—forever silencing her ex-husband’s claim that she is “barren as a desert.” But her joy dims when the strain of raising seven children and Nnaife’s prodigality become a perennial source of stress for her.
Still, Nnu Ego resigns herself to the inconveniences of staying married to a wayward man because tradition demands it.
The duty to submit to tradition runs deep in The Joys of Motherhood. Nnu Ego suppresses her displeasure over Nnaife’s new wife to take on the role of the “sophisticated Ibuza wife” and encourages her sons but not her daughters to invest more time into their school work, even as she questions society’s favouritism towards male children.
“But who made the law that we should not hope in our daughters?” she ponders. “We women subscribe to that law more than anyone. Until we change all this, it is still a man’s world, which women will always help build.”
In the end, Nnu Ego is a woman torn between honouring tradition and embracing modernity.
The Joys of Motherhood neither aims to elevate motherhood to loftier heights nor celebrate its finest moments. If anything, the novel is an achingly sad montage of a woman who sacrifices herself for the sake of everyone around her.
A version of this review appeared in Dec-Feb edition of Inzozi, Rwandair's in-flight magazine.
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